I fell in love with you. I am in love with you. I don’t how I fell in love with you, but I did. And I know you don’t love me back. You’ve never been in love. Almost 3 decades without loving a partner. But just having you in my life is enough to keep my heart beating and my lips smiling."
I am a drug abuser, because I like to connect with my spirituality.
I am a joke, because I am too good for you, and you know this.
I will not let you touch my happiness with a ten foot pole, my life is as good as it has ever been, and I will not let some ignorant, naive, overweight buffoon affect the way I feel."
A LETTER FROM MYSELF.
I’m sorry he hurt you—
I hate myself for just
Watching helplessly as
He speaks the words that wipe the smile
right off your face,
Words that drain the blood
Out of your veins
Until your soft skin bruises like
Stars on a black sky,
and your face pales like
the caps in the snow.
and they all agree with him,
the image he has of you.
That you are nothing.
But you are so beautiful,
and kind, with a soft heart.
They are blind.
As he hurts you again and again.
with words and actions.
And you say nothing,
Not even a whimper,
Not even a hint of fear
4 hours ago
"who dropped like a feather into my mess of a life.
you lay your head across my chest and breathe
You ask me where I came from,
How I ended up in your life,
I wonder the same thing.
We just click, just like that,
Like I’ve known you for years and years,
A decade older than me,
I wonder how this will work.
I stay awake to watch you sleep
and I feel so helpless
and young
and stupid
because
maybe
I’m falling in love again.
You tell me you’ve never been in love.
twenty nine years without love must be a lonely feeling.
And I hope I can change that."
I find comfort in them.
I get so scared sometimes,
there’s only one of you.
And I lost you,
but not forever.
Just for now.
Maybe a long time.
But I will read these books,
and bury myself deep within the pages.
And hopefully,
by the time I come out,
You’ll be there with a cup of tea,
and those warm hands I know so well.
Hopefully."
smoking your 27,
wearing those stupid heart shaped, rose colored glasses.
Your eyes are brown.
I don’t even like brown eyes.
You laughed at me in my sombrero and poncho
I laughed at you in that dumb furry vest.
I was happy.
You told me I made you happy.
That was a nice night."
It’s always hard to lose something.
But I realized yesterday,
how bad you are for me.
After that last phone call full of tears,
i let out a long deep breath
and out came the bullshit.
I was just tired.
I finally let go.
Exhausted physically and emotionally of trying to hold onto what i thought was love
love doesn’t hurt, love doesn’t make you feel like shit. Love doesn’t make you feel hopeless.
So maybe there was nothing there at all.
I am so ready.
I am so so so ready to start my life.
It’s going to be beautiful.
And I am actually kind of happy you’re not in it."
A girl met a boy
and she loved him
more than moonlight
and the starry sky,
more than changing seasons,
or oversized sweaters,
more than polaroids and postcards,
old typewriters,
or record players,
concert tickets
and the text she highlighted
in her favorite novels.
she had come to love
everything he was
and everything she
had made him into
her heart swelled as
the days passed by
she was so full of love
for him and hope
that she forgot to do
what so many forget to do
she forgot to leave room
to love herself.
I’ve got to tell you
how I love you always
I think of it on grey
mornings with death
in my mouth the tea
is never hot enough
then and the cigarette
dry the maroon robe
chills me I need you
and look out the window
at the noiseless snow
At night on the dock
the buses glow like
clouds and I am lonely
thinking of flutes
I miss you always
when I go to the beach
the sand is wet with
tears that seem mine
although I never weep
and hold you in my
heart with a very real
humor you’d be proud of
the parking lot is
crowded and I stand
rattling my keys the car
is empty as a bicycle
what are you doing now
where did you eat your
lunch and were there
lots of anchovies it
is difficult to think
of you without me in
the sentence you depress
me when you are alone
Last night the stars
were numerous and today
snow is their calling
card I’ll not be cordial
there is nothing that
distracts me music is
only a crossword puzzle
do you know how it is
when you are the only
passenger if there is a
place further from me
I beg you do not go
the world stopped,
time slowed down.
I looked at my hands, they weren’t mine.
I could feel my heart beat hollow inside my chest.
I was scared. I didn’t know what to do next.
I felt so lost.
But the sun kept coming up every morning,
the waves still crashed on the rocks,
the ants kept collecting, the birds kept singing, the world was moving forward.
And I felt something deep with in me,
I felt the beauty and love around me, and in me, and I didn’t need yours anymore.
If I kept waiting for you, I would miss out on the wonderful opportunities that this life has to give me.
I will always love you,
but now I move forward. I rise with the sun,
crash with the waves,
sing with birds,
This is the time for me.
I stopped holding on to the idea of love,
and when I did,
love came to me,
in many different sizes, shapes and forms.
And I couldn’t be happier with my life,
right here.
Right as I am."
I believe in magic and people and pinky and stamp promises, and I’m kind of in love with the beauty and ugliness of the world. I like flaws and feel more comfortable around people who have them. And when it comes down to it, I don’t want everything to add up to the perfect equation. I want mess…
Eyes blue in the sea,
Hair black as ravens wings.
Sometimes when it is late in the night I swear I can hear you sing to me.
I try to listen harder, but it’s just the wind in the trees,
Yesterday I saw your dress, and I wept.
I fit into it now.
It doesn’t feel right when I wear it.
Because when I look in the mirror wrapped in the black fabric, I see you.
I see you everywhere.
skin the color of the sand.
lips red like the fiery hills of Sedona.
I swear I saw you walking down pine street.
And when I turned to see you better,
it was just the reflection of myself.
And I stood there,
shocked.
Because What I realized,
is that I am you.
And I hate that.
I hate that.
I hate that."
